Being in a long-term relationship is a joy, but in some cases can feel like a chore. Couples tend to get stale or bored over time, which can lead to communication problems, arguments and even deeper problems. But if you’ve ever read a relationship book, it feels like you’ve read most of their suggestions before. Here are 7 relationship tips that you haven’t heard before:
1. Decide Already!
How many times have the two of you had a back and forth about what movie to see or where to eat that goes something like this: “where do you want to go?’ “I don’t know, where do you want to go?” Stop waiting for the other person to choose and start resolving in a fast and fun way. Countdown 3, 2, 1 and say the first thing that comes to mind! Or play “5-3-1” – you or your spouse names 5 options. The other person eliminates two of them, then you eliminate two and the “1” that is left standing wins.
2. Learn Something New
Forget buying each other things for anniversaries, birthdays or holidays. Instead give each other classes that may interest them. Choose from things like cooking, painting, pottery throwing, golf lessons, tennis lessons, rock climbing, language lessons, diving, drawing, crafting and more! Sometimes you can take classes together, like ballroom dancing, but it’s also fun to learn an activity on your own and then share your thoughts about it with your spouse. It will give you something new to talk about and do!
3. There is No Breaking Up
Are you one of those couples who constantly threaten to breakup or divorce during the middle of big arguments? If so, stop using the divorce and breakup threat. Taking it off the table will defuse the tension. Some couples seem to thrive on the divorce threat, but never really act on it. That’s a bad habit which suggests what you are really craving is drama.
4. Role Play
Want drama? Why not role play? Each of you can create a persona and storyline and then have a date night where you literally pretend to be someone else. Maybe you will play a spy and your husband will be your mark. Maybe the two of you pretend to be two people suddenly thrown together in an arranged marriage. Perhaps your husband plays a billionaire and you his innocent secretary. Whatever excites you should be an option for role play.
5. Admit You’re Wrong
Pick something you have an ongoing fight or issue with and just admit you’re wrong. It’s not that hard when you think about it; surely you’ve been wrong before! The affect this will have on your spouse will be notable. It will also relieve you of a little burden.
6. Sleep in Separate Rooms
Need space? Sleep in separate rooms occasionally on purpose. Even if you don’t think you need the space, you might find out that with a little alone time, you value each other’s company more.
7. Trade Your Most Hated Tasks
Split up the tasks you both hate and assign household chores equally. The cook should cook, and the other person should be responsible for cleaning up. If you both hate dusting or scooping the cat box, do your spouse a kindness by offering to be solely responsible for that hated task for one week. You’ll give your spouse a big break, and they will return the favor the next week (which will become blissfully cat box free!)